tilted behaviour

25:15 … or twenty-five hours and fifteen minutes … or the amount of time it took me between landing in Las Vegas and gambling in a casino.

Unlike the previous four years which saw me hit the gamble within a few hours, I just didn’t fell the urge this time as I opted to go shopping or get hungover instead.

And hungover I did, as last night completely destroyed me, and when I woke up this morning, I swore death had arrived! Mateusz and I grabbed some lunch before jumping on a Pai Gow table where I made some money before eventually falling back to even.

Mateusz returned to his beloved slots and I decided to hit the poker room to take a seat in their lone $1-3 NLH game for $300 which had six players before I joined. One of the first hands I saw was a 100bb pot with middle pair after he called the flop with a backdoor gutshot before turning second pair and calling a substantial check-raise which ended up being good on the river.

That very player a few hands later opened to $16 from early position and I made the call with 6♠ 6♣ from the cutoff as the big blind called too. The K♠ Q♠ 6♥ saw a c-bet of $16 before I popped it up to $42. The big blind passed, but the original raiser made the call before calling off his last $50 on the turn of the 8♣. The river landed the J♣ and I scooped the pot to move to $406.

I then won a smallish pot with King-Queen in a straddle pot when I flopped top pair and got one street of value. As Mateusz returned to signify the end of my session before we had to head to dinner, I opened Q♣ Q♥ to $12 and got three callers to see a Q♠ J♠ 9♥ flop fall. I continued for $22 which found one fold before the player on the button made it $72. The small blind passed, and with my opponent having $90-ish in his stack, I decided to put him all in because of two reasons – firstly I didn’t want to fold regardless of if he had it, and secondly because regardless of the turn (mostly) I was probably calling it off.

I shipped, he called, and the turn and river landed the A♠ and K♠ … YUK! He slammed down his J♣ 9♦ for bottom two pair as I was pushed the pot to move over $620 before eventually cashing out for $618 several hands later.

We headed out to Henderson to Donnie and GG’s house for a cookout with some of our mates including DK, Cory, Kristy and Andrew.

GG cooked a slamming BBQ which included hamburgers, hot dogs and steaks as we ate a bucket load of food out in the backyard before setting up around the fire to talk shit and play a jumbo group game of Lodden Thinks.

It would be five hours before we’d eventually decide to vacate the premises as Mateusz and I made our way to New York New York to catch up with some of my mates from Geelong; Davo and Frog.

As Frog put it in a text message to me … he was chasing skirt … but with Davo gambling away at a roulette table, we decided to join him before persuading him to the Craps table. I quickly lost $100 and we moved back to a different roulette table where both Davo and Mateusz lost some coin as I made a quick $100 before BlackJack was the next stop. Davo went busto as I made a small profit before moving to the Pai Gow tables to join Mateusz.

Once Davo joined us, some cocktails were ordered as we slowly saw our stacks swing up and down. Eventually we decided to call it quits as I finished up $100 for the table and for the session as we left Davo to break the bank on the BlackJack tables.

After yesterdays semi-triumph online my friend Tom told me to come up to Melbourne to help him celebrate his victory in a $109 on PokerStars earlier in the day where he pocketed around $17k.

Never one to turn down a trip up the highway to do something, I joined him and Mateusz at Crown to play the $10 rebuy which I had proved victorious several weeks earlier. Since we were the first ones to sign up, we all started on the same table as our late arrival mate Brendo found himself fortunately on a distant table.

As we started the tournament with $100 worth of rebuys in hand, I told Tom that if he moved all in, I would move all in dark – unfortunately this would have been a great time to shut up as whenever he did move all in it was always with premium as I was left to work some magic with a 4♣ 2♣ or some other junk. Inevitably as we reached the end of the rebuy period, I was in for the clean amount of $100 – the most out of us four as we headed upstairs to the roulette tables so Tom could get a gamble fix.

I had two $5 chips in my pocket and chucked them on the table with one of them on the 29/32 and 8/11 split. Dink! The ball dropped in the 29 and I was returning to the tournament with $90 in hand – just $10 short of my tournament buy-in LOL!

I wouldn’t last too long however as my Jacks lost to Q♣ J♣ and A♥ Q♠ when an Ace fell. And since we decided beforehand that instead of a money last longer we would do push-ups on the tournament floor, I was bound to busting out 30 right next to the feature table where I had been eliminated. Mateusz would follow soon after and do 20, while Brendo finished it off with 10. As for Tom, he managed to luckbox a fourth place as I was located on a $2-3 NLH table where I managed to double up after floating with A♠ 5♠ for a gutshot, backdoor flush draw and ace-high and spiking the wheel on the turn. I raised the turn and he called, and I shipped over his bet on the river with him calling with nines. MBN.

The following day Mateusz, Tom and I went down to the park to re-live our days of playing football. We had a kick, strained a few muscles and pulled out some freaky goals before retiring for another year with some lunch.

Mateusz was working, so Tom and I ventured into Crown to play the $60 Tuesday Turbo tourney where I had made the final table a few times previously. I doubled early with Ace-Jack against a banana’s King-Ten before moving tables where the beautiful Leyla was dealing away. We must have had some connection because I found a double with Queens against King-Jack and then knocked out two players with my Aces against their junk as I was moved to the feature table.

I grinded away for a while, made a three-bet shove with junk because I’m the boss and eventually made the final table sitting second in chips with around 20bbs. With only the top eight being paid, things didn’t start well as I back-to-back hands when I was forced to fold after opening an Ace and then losing a pot when the big blind defended with King-Four against my Eights.

Once we made the money however – a measly $80 – I waited patiently and picked my spots doubling with Ace-King and Ace-Ten against the same player before we were soon three-handed as I held nearly half the chips. Play see-sawed back-and-forth before I was soon heads-up and offered the guy a chop although I held a nearly two-to-one advantage. Yes I know it’s a terrible thing to do since I held such a lead, but it’s something I do in small tournaments regardless of the chip situation (well unless its a 17-to-1 advantage).

Leyla returned to deal to us, but it wouldn’t bring the same luck this time as I lost Ace-Queen to his 10-3 to give-up the lead. With the average stack now at 10bbs Leyla exposed the K♠ which would have matched up with my 6♠ – and being short I would have pushed from the button. Instead I received another six, and when my opponent called with Ace-Three, I flopped a set and he turned an ace but would see the pot pushed to me … thanks Leyla.

On the final hand I woke up with Jacks and instantly called his 5bb ship only to be shown his Queens. Leyla had my back again though as the board bricked out until she dropped a Jack on the river … weeeeeeee!

For the win, I pocketed $734 to continue an outstanding record at Crown in 2011. So far I’m 4/7 with three final tables and two wins – hopefully I can notch a big result soon in a major tourney, and if I can put in another request, I hope it’s in a few weeks at the WSOP!

The past weekend was absolutely hell!

It all started when I headed up to Melbourne on Friday to catch up with some mates. We grabbed some dinner at the local pub while watching some of the Geelong vs Saints match before going bowling.

Mat and GG spotted James and I twenty pins where each game was worth $0.10 a pin, $0.25 a spare, $0.50 a strike and -$1 a first shot gutter ball. With the adjustment, I won by a few pins followed by GG and James while Mat bowled atrociously and owed us each around the $3 mark before the second game saw us readjust the handicap to give Mat ten pins while GG still spotted us twenty.

Mat bowled slightly better, while both James and I couldn’t replicate our 150-plus score of the previous game as GG really cleaned up by bowling out of his skin as the Saints proved victorious and I missed out on my total points bet by two kicks.

Our next stop was Mat’s house where we decided to play a game of Risk – well a few games of Risk – which, when played between some competitive poker players really brought about some intense strategy as the clock ticked into the wee hours of the night. Once the final game was wrapped up, we played a quick game of Bluff, before having to drive GG home – well to Lynn’s house anyway – as we finally got some sleep around the 4am mark.

Once Mat and I finally awoke around lunchtime, we made our way to Westfield to spend a few hours baby-sitting his sister.

Spending nearly more time in the car looking for a park then wondering the shops, once we finally made our way home we watched Fremantle dispatch of Mat’s beloved Hawks before we made our way to Crown to kill some time before we all headed out for some casual drinks.

This is where my weekend from hell started as I took a seat on a $1-2 NLH table and swiftly made one of those once-in-a-lifetime plays!

Posting in late position, there was a raise to $7 and a call, and I tossed in the additional $5 with 6♦ 7♦. The flop fell Q♣ 5♣ 4♠. The original raiser checked, which was followed by a bet of $15. I called, as did the original raiser before the turn landed the 4♥. Check, bet $20, I call and the original raiser decided to opt out as the 8♦ landed on the river. My lone opponent instantly moved all in and I snap-folded . . . errr what . . . yep I totally misread my hand because in my mind I was looking for only a three or a seven, and when it didn’t come on the river I was always folding. When I announced “I fold” and dropped my cards just in front of me I instantly recognised what I did, but since I had already announced a fold, I didn’t think it was ethical to make up some story while revealing my winning straight. Instead I just dropped my head into my hands, didn’t say a word, and painfully watched my opponent and his K♣ Q♦ rake in the pot.

Several hands later after a limp under the gun, I bumped it up to $11 with A♠ K♠ and was instantly shoved on by the limper for roughly $70. I called it off, and was quite puzzled when he tabled his J♦ 10♥. Although I flopped an Ace, he somehow rolled out a four-card flush to force me to top-up once again. Then just two hands later after two limps, I made it $14 to go with K♥ K♦. Both limpers called, and after the Q♥ 10♥ 8♣ flop landed, the same opponent who held the King-Queen earlier, jammed for $140. I shook my head in a what the hell is going on motion before making the call for my $110 or so. The other player folded, and when the 2♥ fell on the turn, followed by the 8♦ on the river, the appropriately named donkey slammed down his 8♠ 4♠ proudly and grabbed my chips before I could even table my hand or signify that I had lost.

Forced to rebuy once again to be in for $300, I eventually started to see some hands hold as I edged out just a negative $100 session while Mat cleaned up – of course through the donkey on three occasions – before we made our way to Public House to meet up with some of the boys for a friends going-away party. It was there that I had realised that I left a bunch of Crown chips in my pocket – and since I wasn’t planning on being back at Crown for quite a while – was out of pocket a few dollars.

The night of having a few casual drinks and watching some beautiful woman walk past was interrupted by GG and his call for help as he was stranded at some club in the city that wasn’t his thing. Mat and I were getting a little peckish and decide to venture to AC/DC lane to find him and save him for an hour or so. Unfortunately GG wasn’t to interested in deserting Lynn, so we jumped back in the car to make our way to China Bar. Just a block away, GG hailed on us again as Lynn was now all partied out and ready to vacate the club. We did a u-turn and picked them up before tucking into some much-needed food with one of my favourite persons in the world . . . a drunk Lynn Gilmartin!

Burping, spilling food on the table, her lap and into her tea, along with plenty of other stuff saw us enjoy a very entertaining meal before we were informed that the boys had vacated Public House in preference for Blue Bar on Chapel Street; and consequently, that’s where we headed. Unfortunately that was a bad idea as we stood outside being denied entry as the wind continued to hurl and the bouncers continued to be douches. A few minutes waiting for James was quickly trumped by the warmth of the car as we dropped GG and a now asleep Lynn back home.

Sunday was the true day of hell for me as it began with my car not starting.

Mat’s Dad kindly jump-started it for me as I made my way back to Geelong. Once at home, that is where I realised that I had left my laptop power cord at Mat’s place to leave me powerless on the eve of leaving for Sydney.

I then decided to play on PKR for a while and loaded up some 100NL tables where I swiftly lost Queens against Jacks, Ace-King against 88 and Kings against Ace-King. I did manage to stack top set of Aces when I flopped a flush with 2♦ 4♦ as I finish down around $50 or so.

I say around because mid multi-tabling, my connection died and all my tables closed. The reason why? GG had passed on details of how to download Jersey Shore episodes, and consequently my desktop caught a virus that shut everything down. Regardless of what I did, combined with the fix I downloaded to combat the virus, nothing managed to work.

Either way . . . from folding the effective nuts, getting plenty of hands cracked, leaving my charger in Melbourne and conducting a virus . . . it was definitely a weekend from hell!

It had been well over three months, but I was finally on my way back to Melbourne for a home game to catch up with a bunch of my poker buddies.

I began Saturday with a trip into town to watch a few hours of my cricket club’s Grand Final (which we eventually lost) before making my way up the highway to Crown. I said hello to some friends I hadn’t seen in ages before making heading to Mat’s house to help set up the home game.

Mat has a bungalow out the back of his house, and now that it has been cleared out, we set up a table in there in preparation for the night.

We had a full table of nine players as we sat down around 8:30pm to play some 25c-50c NLH. I chipped up to around $90 in the first hour before hitting a very cold run of cards for the next several hours. I was pushed out of a few pots to slip back to around $65 before opening with a raise to $1.50 from under the gun with 8♥ 5♥. It was called round to Oatsy on the button who made it $6.50 to go with about $70 behind him. I called, as did three others, to see a flop of A♥ J♠ 8♣ fall and action check round to Oatsy who continued with a very small bet of $7.50. Now I had to decipher what exactly he had.

I had bluffed him on a few occasions and knew that he was capable of folding a hand to me as he is more than solid when it comes to cash games. Also he had been stealing a few pots to accumulate some chips after losing a buy-in early. In this spot there is a good chance that he flopped huge like Aces, Jacks or Ace-Jack or flopped well with Ace-King or Ace-Queen. However I believed his range was more skewed to weaker and more marginal holdings like weak Aces or underpairs and decided that I could successfully win the pot by running an educated bluff.

Now he was never going to fold one of those huge hands, so my bluff would have to see him fold out the top of his perceived slightly weaker range; basically Ace-Ten and worse. One of the players in the hand – Alex – was throwing a huge stare-down at Oatsy like he wanted to get funky with some sort of Ace or Jack so that made me consider a bluff even more.

Taking stack sizes into consideration, I took my time before check-raising to $22 so that if he called it would take the pot to $77.25 and both of us having just on $50 behind (to be honest I really wish I had more so that my turn ship looked more powerful . . . but oh well). Alex took his time before folding before Oatsy spent a minute summing up the situation before calling.

Knowing that he either had it or not, I was looking for a blank on the turn that didn’t improve his middle-tier range so that my shove would force a fold. Now of course if he called I was probably drawing dead!

The turn landed the 2♠ and I moved all in only to be quickly called by Oatsy. I tossed my cards into the muck and announced, “your set is good mate” before he rolled over Jacks. We didn’t even deal a river and I was forced to rebuy another $50 as everyone on the table just looked shocked at what had just gone down.

Money pretty much passed round in circles all night, and I eventually finished even after rivering two-pair with Ace-Ten against Ace-Queen as we called it a night at around 4:30am.

After crashing at Alex’s for the night, I was up earlier then I wished as I was on my way to catch up with a friend at Chadstone for lunch and a movie.

Bec wanted to grab some Yum Cha which I was happy to oblige with although I found it oddly strange not to be eating Yum Cha in Chinatown where I’m use to. Afterwards we decided to summon our inner-child and decided to watch the newly released How To Train Your Dragon in 3D.

Toothless and Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III

Getting use to the 3D glasses took longer than I expected but they definitely worked in some parts of the movie, otherwise it was probably no different to watching it in the normal 2D format. All-in-all I definitely recommend seeing it as it does have an interesting storyline and was pretty funny even if you aren’t a child.

Bec made her way home to prepare for her new job starting tomorrow while I made my way to Crown to play in Event 8: $200 No Limit Holdem / Pot Limit Omaha Teams Event with Alex.

He sat down first to play the NLH orbit while I was due to play the PLO one. We got off to a slow start with not much action from either game before I chipped up on the last hand of my orbit when I raised from the button over a few limpers holding 8♣ 7♣ 7♠ 5♥ and took the pot down with a continuation bet on the 10♠ 3♠ 3♣ board.

During my next PLO orbit I was dealt Aces twice and picked up the blinds with an under the gun raise and then limped in from the cutoff before taking it down on the flop. However – just like the previous orbit – I won a substantial pot on the final hand of the level when after a limp I raised holding Q♥ J♣ J♠ 9♠. The big blind called as did the limper before a flop of 10♣ 7♣ 2♠ fell. The limper fired out for pot and I felt like he had complete air and decided to make the call as the big blind passed. We both checked the 6♠ on the turn before I was faced with another pot-sized bet when the river landed the Q♦. I tanked for about a minute before making the call to be shown a pair of sixes and three cards forming the rest of his air.

Unfortunately for us things would fall apart in the next PLO orbit when the most aggressive player on the table flopped top set of sevens on me and I was forced to fold to his check-raise. A few hands later I called one of his light raises from the button with A♠ K♠ 6h 5♥. Dean Francis – a solid PLO regular player – also called from the big blind and fired out pot on a fairly dry board with an overpair and flush draw as I folded and Alex subbed in.

We wouldn’t last too many more hands when after facing a limp for 1,200 from the hi-jack, Alex jammed for over 7,000 from the cutoff holding Q♦ 9♦. His opponent took his time before calling, only to table a dominating A♣ 9♥. We turned a gutshot but blanked as we hit the rail in about 40th place from the original 118 starters.

Although it wasn’t a greatly successful poker trip up to Melbourne, it was great to catch up with everyone and am looking forward to getting back there next weekend.

I wasn’t expecting to play anymore live poker for the week, but I guess I was wrong.

Driving up on Friday afternoon, I headed to the airport to pick up my cousin and his girlfriend from the airport. It was part thank-you for letting me stay at their house, part another reason to play at Crown, and part I didn’t want them to shell out the money to grab a cab.

After unloading the car once back at theirs, I made my way to Crown and found a seat on a $2-3 NLH table.

I had chipped up to around $250 on a table that featured a bunch of weak passive players who really struggled post-flop when this hand came up. Everyone limped in, and I did so on the button with J♦ 9♣ to see a flop of Q♦ 5♣ 9♦ fall and a bet of $10 follow from one of the limpers. This player had turned over a few ‘unique’ hands where he had barrelled bottom-pair etc, so his bet didn’t seem overly strong to me. A first time player made the call, before I bumped it to $37. The flop aggressor called as did the noob before I dinged the 9♠ on the turn.

Very comfortable with where I now sat in the hand, it shocked me to see the aggressor fire out (after just calling on the flop) $25. The noob called and I thought for a little before making it $68 to go and was instantly snapped off before the noob passed.

The river landed the 6♥ and I was met with an instant announcement of a bet of $100 as my now lone opponent in the hand fumbled while cutting down the amount to call.

I sat in the tank for around three minutes trying to decipher the whole hand. I couldn’t factor him to have a better nine, but more likely held a busted draw or even just a Queen. Eventually I called and internally puked when he rolled over his 8♠ 7♥ for a rivered gutshot to leave me with just $40 and send me to my wallet to top up.

Reviewing the hand, I think I bet the turn way too small, but either way I managed to add a further $200 to my stack the next hand when my two-pair held up against two players top pair.

Eventually though I got my now favourite opponent back when I opened from late position holding A♣ 10♥ and was flatted by the button and my nemesis from the big blind. The flop fell down K♠ Q♥ J♠ and I was faced with a donked out $20 bet in which I just called as the button folded. The turn landed the 6♣ and he fired out $30 in which I just called. The river landed the ugly 9♣ and my nemesis fired out $25. I exchanged some friendly banter before splashing the pot with a bet of $140.

He immediately called, rolled over Q♦ J♥, and I scooped the pot to put my stack upwards of $650.

I decided to call the session to an end when I double a short-stack up with a weaker top-pair to eventually cash out up just under $200 for the session before Mat made his way to Crown and we decided to see the new movie Daybreakers . . . if you like Vampires or need an occasional startle in a dark room then go see it.

I headed into Crown at the early time of 10am to test my luck in the Saturday morning $25 rebuy donkament.

I tried to enjoy the rebuy period and was all in at least ten times with five of them being without looking at my cards. After the rebuy period was over, I had spent $100 and had just over a 3,000-chip stack courtesy of a late triple up holding 10♠ 10♣.

Once we returned after the break, the levels picked up and facing a short-stack’s all in, I pushed with 5♦ 5♥ and was called by the big stack’s K♥ Q♥. The short-stack held tens, and once a Queen flopped, it was over as I was bundled out in 45th of the 72 starters.

Heading to a $2-3 NLH table I played for nearly five hours getting up $50, then losing $100, getting up $50, then losing $100. Eventually I decided that it wasn’t going to be a good day and walked out (thankfully) up $50 and made my way back home.

Growing up in Australian surrounded by Australian friends, there was never a doubt that footy code I would pick up as a little part-haired kid would of course be Aussie Rules Football . . . but times change!

Although I’m still – and always will be – a passionate Western Bulldogs supporter, recent times have seen me switch codes to soccer, or football depending where you live.

This is mainly due to my mates and fellow indoor teammates James and Mat who are huge soccer fanatics and Manchester United fans. Now having them sweat matches as they loyally support the Red Devils, made me get thinking that maybe I should support a team since I tend to follow the sport more regularly nowadays.

When I was younger I use to like Liverpool because Harry Kewell (since he was Australian and all) played for them, but due to him moving to Galatasaray at the same time my interest in the game began to increase, it doesn’t seem appropriate to support them.

There are a lot of players that I enjoying watching in the English Premier League, and picking a team was really difficult, but when Lucas Neill signed with Everton to join fellow Australian Tim Cahill, I found it completely appropriate to latch on and support Everton. Throw in the fact that their star player is Australian and also named Tim, and that my dad lived near their home ground when he was a kid and that their major sponsor is a Thailand beer company . . . did I really need any other reasons to support them?

I may only know a handful of players, and may even get some names wrong (thanks to James for the corrections), but I enjoy watching a team that I can now say I support and consequently can get passionate about.

However saying you support a team is one thing, but wearing their colours proud is another!

Consequently I jumped online the other day and had a look around the Everton Online Store. After spending the good part of half an hour looking at every item for sale, I decided to grab just two items.

Firstly a blue Everton Training Vest to slum around when the weather heats up or use for heading down to the beach or cricket training and secondly a black Everton Training Top to wear on a casual basis. Expecting them to arrive in another week or two, I was pleasantly surprised this morning to see a package on my desk containing two wonderful gifts!

Although they may not be the most highly sought after gear for Everton supporters, I feel that I’ll get the most wear out of these two items . . . and anyway . . . I’m still a noob supporter, because who knows what we’ll see in the future . . . maybe a personalised DUCKWORTH #10 will soon be on order!

It had been a while since I’ve been up to Melbourne – and with a going away ‘party’ and a friend’s 21st – there was no reason why I shouldn’t journey up the highway.

I say ‘party’ because it was actually my mate Oatsy’s farewell APL Tournament at the Veneto Club in Bulleen where he has been the Tournament Director for the last few years.

Driving up to Melbourne I planned to meet James in the city at around 6pm before waiting round for Mat to finish work at 7pm. I found a park on Spring Street and met James at Parliament station before we headed down Collins Street to meet up with James’ new Bec.

We grabbed Mat outside of his work and made our way in peak hour city traffic to the Veneto Club a little late, but thanks to the huge turnout, the event was behind schedule.

James, Mat and I were all bounties for the night and Oatsy introduced us – along with the other few bounties – as we took our seats at our assigned tables.

Luckily for me us bounties started with a 5,000-chip starting bank compared to the other players 3,000 as I got stacked early on. With a few limps ahead of me for 50, I made it 325 to holding A♠ A♥ and was called by both the blinds. The flop fell down J♠ 8♥ 3♥ and I made it 775 to go. The lady in the small blind check-called as the big blind folded to see the Q♠ land on the turn and a check from both of us. The river fell the 2♥ and she fired out 2,000. I shook my head threw in two chips and called out to the Tournament Director for a rebuy as I held my rebuy card up in the air. The lady turned over J♥ J♥ to rake in the pot as I topped up another 2,000.

Mat was out shortly after the first break when he found the old King-high and made his way home to get changed, as I got moved to a table to take up Bec’s seat. I shoved dark a few times before eventually calling off my chips in a three-way all in pot after sweating just the 8♠. My 2♠ to go with it did me poorly after one of the all-ins flopped top set of Jacks as I exited the tournament to now go and sweat James.

We poked and prodded at his continued folding until he finally called off his chips with a dominated A♥ 2♥. Everyone shared a shot with a very wasted Oatsy as we made our way to the city to hit up our 21st party.

Mateusz Pater, Andrew Oataway, Bec Hoult, James Bernard and Brendan White

The original plan was to meet one of my fellow poker friends Michael Palti at the Red Hummingbird on Russell St, but due to some dress code complications, Palti and his entourage were forced to move to the cocktail bar Mai Tai’s just down on the corner.

We began our night with all of us ordering a surprisingly strong mix of Long Island Red Bull’s and Long Island Ice Tea’s as we did what everyone does when consuming alcohol . . . talking shit!

Palti was busy entertaining his friends, but eventually found some time to come talk to us before leaving us to continue chatting on about everything and anything. Another round of cocktail’s followed as Palti and some of his mates headed to Maccas for a late-night snack. We eventually finished our drinks before deciding that Stalactites was our answer to some hunger!

Bec and Mat had never been before, and a fantastic garlic-covered souvlaki later, they had been broken in the Stalactites way!

We called it a night, and after driving Mat and Brendo home, I drove the two lovebirds to the station where James had left his car, and I made my way back to Geelong at the healthy time of 4am . . . now to catch a few hours sleep before cricket!

The car was full, the boot packed and the esky filled with alcohol as I began my drive from Geelong to Doncaster and then to Traralgon for a weekend with the boys.

We ended up leaving Melbourne around 7:30pm once everyone had finished work with three cars including James, Mat, Brendo, myself, James’ brother Adam and his four Irish back-packer mates along with some of James’ soccer buddies.

Arriving at the Monash University Gippsland campus, we all checked into one of the on-campus residential dorms that had six bedrooms for us twelve guys. We settled in, grabbed some food, and began a long night of drinking, kicking a soccer ball up and down the hallway, Bluff and Kings.

After a 4am end to the previous night debauchery we were all woken relatively early due to the soaring heat that seeped into our rooms.

James had to coach a soccer match in Moe – the main reason why we all came down as he gets very very lonely – and had left early along with a full car of followers, while the Irish and Adam began drinking. Mat, Brendo and I headed into Traralgon to grab a pub meal, scoop out what the town had to offer and also let Mat place a bet or seven on the races.

The town, although small, still had everything that we needed as none of us managed to finish our pub meal. Mat was unable to gamble up riches, but still managed to keep some money in his pocket as we returned back to the University to play a six-on-six half pitch soccer match.

The blazing heat continued to beat down on us as the Irish, along with Adam and Brendo, were no match for the ‘home’ team. We all returned back to the dorm to shower and prepare ourselves for a huge night out!

Our first stop was Star Bar and an order of Jagerbombs! We all settled around the pool table as the place was fairly quiet. Eventually the ladies started pouring in – and what surprised us all was the fact that out of the whole place there were only about twenty blokes; with us making the majority of that number up. More and more alcohol began to be consumed as we all hit the dancefloor to show these country-folks what us city slickers are made of.

Probably the funniest part of the night was when I organised a funny photo with James involving two bridesmaids on a Hens night. They both had these blow-up dildo’s and I asked them to spitroast him for a funny Facebook photo.

”Do you want to do him from behind or from the front?”
“I take it from behind, but I won’t give it to you from behind!”

We all burst into laughter and snapped away at scene before making our way to the second stop of the night – Inferno / Saloon Bar.

If any of you have been to Cheers on Glenferrie Road, Hawthorn, then you would know exactly what this place was like. Two different dancefloors with different music, pool tables, multiple bars and a young crowd overfilled with guys. We all went from room to room dancing and drinking the night away before a few of us ended the night early at around 4am.

Waking up around midday to find a few of the boys returning home early due to prior commitments, the rest of us packed up the dorm and grabbed some lunch before making our way back to Traralgon to catch the last match James had to coach for the weekend.

A favourable 3-1 scoreline ended our weekend as the Irish and Adam headed to Phillip Island while James and I made our way back to Melbourne.